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NVC Resources on Peace

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  1. You’re Not Too Much

    You’re Not Too Much

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/11/2021

    Trainer Tip: We all have the same needs, but may prioritize different needs at different times -- and that order of prioritization may look different from other people's perspectives. If your prioritization of needs isn't the same as another's, that doesn't mean there's something wrong with you nor them. We can look for many ways to meet our prioritized needs.

  2. Focusing on Where We Are the Same

    Focusing on Where We Are the Same

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/2/2021

    Trainer Tip: Our differences are not in our needs, but in how we attempt to meet them. This simple truth can help you lessen the conflicts in your life and your judgments of other people. Rather than focus on where you disagree, focus on where you are the same. This shift can make a profound difference in your ability to understand yourself and other people, and to bring unity to your life.

  3. When Hearing A “No”

    When Hearing A “No”

    Demanding Versus Persisting

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 12/20/2021

    Trainer Tip: When they say "no", acknowledge what people are saying "yes" to. From there, you persist towards a resolution that values both party's needs, without demand. Persisting is when we try to meet needs by continuing to connect with another. Demanding is when we insist someone do something, or else face negative repercussions. Showing care and willingness to work with people can help them to want to collaborate and resolve conflict.

  4. The Value of Change

    The Value of Change

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/29/2021

    Trainer Tip: Wanting collaboration? Show you value the other person's needs as much as your own. After you both feel heard, you can make joint decisions about specifics of the agreement, such as "division of work", "scope of project", "when the action will take place", "how it'll be done" and "timing of follow up to see how things went". Read on for an example of how this is applied to asking someone to pitch in with doing chores.

  5. Supporting Our Loved Ones In Living Authentically

    Supporting Our Loved Ones In Living Authentically

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/19/2022

    Trainer Tip: Sometimes the people in our lives don’t yet have the skills to speak directly about what they want. When this happens we can make guesses about how they feel and what they want. This can lead to greater connection and chances we all can be more satisfied with our interactions.

  6. Celebrate Your Progress!

    Celebrate Your Progress!

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/1/2022

    Trainer Tip: Overwhelmed with all that you want to do? If so, what are you working to change? Is it a behavior or a consciousness? Where were you with this issue when you first decided to create change? And now where are you? Celebrating your progress can encourage you to keep trying. You wouldn’t expect to jump on a treadmill and jog three miles the first time. Don't have the same expectations for your emotional fitness either!

  7. Letting Go of Resentments

    Letting Go of Resentments

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/23/2022

    Trainer Tip: When we feel resentment toward others, we are harming our own emotional health. Surprisingly, when we own up to our part of an uncomfortable situation, we can release the pain and resentment. Such honesty can provide healing. Read on for a related anecdote of how this can play out.

  8. Keeping Our Perspective

    Keeping Our Perspective

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/7/2022

    Trainer Tip: We all want to be valued in our totality, to be loved even when we make mistakes. Wouldn’t we also like to offer this to ourselves? Compassion is about seeing the humanness in everyone, including ourselves. One way to express compassion is to remember your entire relationship and history of love with someone as a whole, rather than focusing on one disappointing incident.

  9. Getting Started

    Getting Started

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/5/2022

    Trainer Tip: Identify one goal and take one small step toward achieving it today. It doesn’t matter how much or how often. The reward is in taking the first step, and then the second and third until you’ve attained your goal.

  10. Shooting For The Moon

    Shooting For The Moon

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/19/2022

    Trainer Tip: In a Compassionate Communication process, we believe there are enough resources in the Universe to meet all of our needs. Most people are stumped because they can only see one strategy for meeting a need. Identify one need that you would like to experience more of and make a list of at least five strategies for meeting it today.

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