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NVC Resources on Judgment

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  1. When faced with someone’s grief for the world, how do you engage with them in a way that is informed? In this session, Kristin suggests exploring what they might be grieving… what they’re afraid of losing… and what it is that they love.

  2. Listen to Mary tackle one of the greatest challenges of facilitating an NVC group: How do you deal with hecklers and people you don't like? Mary offers insightful tips and helpful guidance.

  3. I'll Work on Me, You Work on You

    I'll Work on Me, You Work on You

    Jim Manske

    Articles · 5 - 8 minutes · 10/24/2018

    As a beginner in NVC, you might find your attempts to practice your NVC only increases conflict, disconnection and upset in your interactions with people.  Or perhaps people start seeing you as inauthentic. From there, you may find yourself sinking deeper into self-judgement. In this article, Jim Manske shows us how to shift these potential unintended outcomes, into deeper NVC consciousness that brings in more warmth, presence and open-hearted connection.

  4. Overcoming Defensiveness

    Overcoming Defensiveness

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 5 - 7 minutes · 9/30/2019

    A big part of why receiving feedback is so challenging is because so few people around us know how to give feedback untainted with criticism, judgment, or our personal upset. But, if we wait for others to offer us usable, digestible, manageable feedback, we will not likely receive sufficient feedback for our growth and learning. Instead, we can grow in our capacity to fish the pearl that’s buried within. Here are three specific suggestions for how.

  5. Ingrid shares about the three primary keys of parenting & NVC, two child rearing models, developmental needs for children and how to foster secure attachment.

  6. Express Anger with Responsibility

    Express Anger with Responsibility

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 3 - 5 minutes · 8/7/2021

    Anger can bring in judgment and blame. Instead, use anger and frustration to identify what’s important and express what matters to you in a collaborative way.

  7. When was the last time you were in a situation with an overwhelming feeling of shame or an unnerving fear of 'doing it wrong'? Sometimes we get sweaty palms or a dry mouth, maybe we freeze on the spot or start an unhelpful internal monologue that makes the situation feel even worse. In this months NVC Life Hack Gesine takes a closer look at her own experience with shame and the fear of doing it wrong.

  8. Defusing Anger

    Defusing Anger

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/25/2018

    Trainer Tip: Many of us are afraid of our anger because we haven’t learned how to express it in a way that brings relief or that helps us meet our needs in the situation. Consider a different approach to anger, one that helps you fully express your anger and is more likely to help you meet your needs for relief, to be heard, or to be understood.

  9. Increasing Your Capacity to Feel

    Increasing Your Capacity to Feel

    Eric Bowers

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 1/28/2019

    What's really going on underneath the surface when we bring or encounter blame, judgements, pain -- and thereby the inability to empathize, be present, attuned, or responsive?  Why does this happen even if one or more people in a relationship dynamic is working hard at bringing in an NVC response? This article addresses these and more questions from the perspective of how our brains are affected in our relationships.

  10. Aya Caspi delves into the impact of societal structures and parenting approaches on individuals, particularly the prevalence of extrinsic motivation rooted in fear of punishment, desire for rewards, and a sense of obligation. The emphasis is on how these dynamics contribute to collective trauma and affect brain development. Examples, such as Hitler's childhood and the adverse effects of the educational system, are used to illustrate the consequences of such practices. Aya advocates for systemic change in these structures and emphasizes the role of non-judgmental practices in potentially reducing adult depression. The discussion highlights the importance of empathy and challenges the traditional methods that may lead to emotional neglect and trauma, emphasizing the potential benefits of embracing non-judgmental approaches in parenting and societal frameworks.

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